Hellooooooo, I am still loving the holidays. I did nothing much today. I woke up at 1pm watched half of The Incredibles and headed down to Toa Payoh to meet the lovely chocolatey Audrey. She gave me the latest of Prison Break and I gave her ALOT of cartoons to prepare her for her journey of working at the kids section of Borders.

I feel like playing my Sims 2. Yes, I only half the first one..no expansion pack..no money and no time to play. I think The Sims is like the best game ever invented.

Ok I am catching Project Runway 3 on TV later. I think I am staying at home tomorrow to make a new layout and make my dollhouses and roll around the house.

Audrey gave me a whole bottle of Bacardi Limon cos she doesn’t like it. Wooo.

Ok bye I am off to pout.

HELLO, I am finally updating. Have been sooooo busy and tired recently but it’s ok cos:

IT’S HOLIDAY TIME!!

Yes yes yes, it’s hols times. I never wish for a break so badly. I think school + part-time job = crazy break longing. Really..sometimes the lack of time for everything just drives you crazy and you break down and refuse to do any work and pout. They just released the timetable for block 6 (next, next week) and guesss whaaaaat, I don’t have any class!! That means I get 1? months break! WOOOOOHOOO. Cool shit. I really think I deserve a break.

Anyway, sadly, I didn’t manage to hand in my Prepress assignment on Friday. Everything was too rushed and due to the lack (or none) of sleep the night before, I was super blur and screwed up everything. If my mind was clear and running, I actually could have handed it up on Friday. Hon says he will cut my marks cos I didn’t go for the excursion on Thurs and didn’t hand up on Friday. Screw it..I tried my best and it’s not my fault the school system sucks. Monday was pretty rush too with the last minute problem with printing and stuff but it’s over and done with and I don’t give a shit.

I actually made up my mind to quit Starbucks to join Borders but not anymore. See, the manager that I was damn pissed at the other day..we are ok now. He was nice to me the other day as if nothing happened so fine..I just let it be. I talked to my store manager about my whole working journey and all.

See, what I had in my head was like a “see-how” shift for that day..if everything is still as screwed up..really there was no point in staying. As it is possibly my last shift if I am quitting, I went to work with a lighter heart/mood/whatever-you-call-it. I think going to work with a clear mind (no school work stress) feels completely different too. The people there are really nice and fun..I just managed to establish a friendship with everyone..I can’t bear to it. And anyway, Audrey told me Borders is left with vancancy for the Paperchase section only. I loooooove Paperchase but it would be more fun if you can do everything.

So in summary: I am staying in Starbucks.

It feels awesome to sleep as much as I want. I even force myself to sleep more, I LOVE the feeeeeling of freeeddooooom. I went to MOM (Minstry of Manpower) to lodge my complain of fucking Nine West. Everything went smoothly..fast..the officer was damn charming and nice. Everyone was like staring at me..why is this young girl doing here alone? But anyway, I really hope it settles fast and privately so I need not go down to MOM again for the conciliation meeting.

Oh if you got nothing to do, like me, go here. You can find out the company’s infomation. Try typing in ‘Gucci’ or ‘Starbucks’. Ok, I am really lazy to type out what it does but it is really nothing much.

After that, I went to town to meet the lovely Audrey John who gave me this really cute batch:

Ahh..Borders seem really fun but next time maybe. We did nothing much, just stared and admired each other’s face.

Ok I think I am going to sleep. I’ve got nothing to do tomorrow, I think I am going to make a dollhouse and meet Audrey. And before I leave, I shall show you a picture of my house lobster. No, it’s really small. And a fact: Do you know there are 1 blue lobster in every 4 million? I think it’s damn cool, I told like the whole world already.

And oh, I packed my roooooooom, it’s lovely and clean and nice and awesooooooome. I love clean places..I am a obsessive cleaner. My room was so messy during my deadlines period, I had to jump through the mess to get to my table.

I am not going back to my motherland anymore. My mum and I were planning to go back cos she’s jobless at the moment and I am going to have holiday but..she got a job today. She went for a couple of interviews and one of them give her a job today. She wanted to work there..the pay is good, good benefits and the boss is a Christian. The last few childcare centres she worked at had really evil/cheap-skate/ bosses. She feel really blessed to get a job there. Good for her, bad for me..I can’t go back HK. I wanted to go back and take pictures for my portfolio but well..too bad.

My room is in a terrible, terrible mess now. I am an obessive cleaner but once a small part of the room is messy, it will make the whoooole room messy till the next time I have a big cleaning session. I think I am wierd but that’s really ok.

My room will be messy till at least till Friday which is my submission date. Hon said we can hand in Prepress on Monday BUT you get 5 marks less (which is a grade down) if you hand in on Monday. It is actually equivenlent to late submission..just a nicer way to put it. I am trying to complete it on Friday and finally enjoy my holiday. It would be terrible to have to waste a weekend on work.

Ok back to work and pray that I can complete on time. There will be alot of running around on Friday to print and complete my work.

Laters.

I never like local shows..they are just boring and cheesy but “Stories Of Love, The Anthology Series” on every Tuesday at 10pm is pretty good. I watched the first episode last week and cried like shit. Maybe it’s the crying factor that makes it good. At least the actors acts pretty well compared to alot of local shows that have really bad actors.

ANYWAY, I watched America’s Next Top Model (cycle 6) just now..it’s pretty boring. Maybe cos every cycle is pretty much the same thing. The girls are boring..except the Jade girl who is damn annoying.

I saw the trailer for Prison Break on Channel 5 just now. GO WATCH! It’s really the best show ever..damn exciting, makes you curse and swear after every episode cos you can’t wait to watch the next.

Ok I dedicated this very special moment (starting: NOW) to Audrey cos she introduced the show to me.

Nothing much happened today..I stayed at home and did my work. I did quite a bit. I mean at least reasonably more than other days.

My mum is jobless again. Her new job’s boss fired her cos she found a China woman who is willing to take her place with lesser pay and longer hours. I really have nothing against foreigners but they are taking away jobs from the locals. Seriously..there are SO many China woman working here (yes including the prostitutes). I mean foreign construction workers..fair enough cos no locals want to take the job. Ok maybe I am not in the position to say this cos I moved from HK to here but..yes you get my point.

My mum really didn’t like her job and her boss too so fine. There is this job opening at YMCA. She can be assured a better working environment but it’s too far from our house. I told my mum why not just go for it if working there would be more enjoyable compared to those neighbour childcare centres. She said I was crazy. Well..this is generation gap..thinkings are different.

Ok this is a really long post. I hope you are not asleep yet.

I am obessed with CSI. I catch every episode on TV. Ok just some random fact.

And I most probably am going back to Hong Kong next week or next, next week. Pretty suddenly.

It’s been sometime since I stayed home and need not wake up at 5am on Saturdays and Sundays. I always work opening on Sats and Suns. It feels great to be able to sleep in, wake up and watch Animal Planet (OR Discovery Channel - cooler? No?) and not face those grumpy and rich and ignorant customers in the morning.

The last shift I worked was Monday and the next is most probably the coming Sunday so it’s somewhat like a 2 weeks break inbetween. Now I dragged going back to work. I don’t know why..I never had this thought..only after that fucked up incidents on Monday. I mean yeah..sometimes it’s frustrating and upsetting when you get customers that are demanding, yell at you and stuff but I never thought of leaving my job but now I do. I wanted to work in Starbucks long term cos I had an enjoyable experience in Campasspoint but I guess it’s different in Liat Towers..I don’t think I am suitable for that stressful environment. I fucking drag seeing my manager and feeling like shit cos of him.

I worry alot, even if I don’t know what will happen during my next shift, I always predict the worst. This is bad..it just stresses me out. Fuck.

Anyway, I just had Roti Prata and Otak from Jalan Kayu for breakfast. Ok I think that was quite random. And I feel I am talking to myself which I am. Ok I will shut up.
I watched ‘I am Sam’ yesterday night on Channel 5. I cry everytime I watch the trailer so I predicted I will cry during like a mad cow during the movie but I didn’t cos I watched with my mum. I don’t cry infront of them.

The movie was good, it could be better. The storyline is very touching. Sean Penn and Dakota Fanning was acted really well in it.

I managed to designed something for my VSC P2. I always procastinate..cos I just don’t have any motivation to do it. Go check out this portfolio site: pixelpastry.com. Ping was in my design school in Year 1, got suspended (some reason) and then left school..she is in LaSalle now. THAT is what call awesome work and talented. Wah..I saw that and totally felt like someone stepped on my face.

Ok I will stop thinking and get back to worrrrrrk.

All the hormonal stuff during PMS is getting the hold of me. I think there’s something wrong with my hormonal system..I cry about everything. Thinking of something makes me cry. Of cos they are unhappy stuff..not crying for some random fat dude sleeping on the bus. But anyway, it feels terrible to be affected by everything and it doesn’t do any good I am already a very emotional and sensitive person.

There was something wrong with the uploading of this particular image at Photobucket..no idea why, I tried everything..renaming, editing size and format, nothing works. I was so annoyed..I tried since yesterday. Being the perfectionist I am..I redid the whole collage and it worked in the end.

I stayed at home today, I was too lazy to go school..rather stay at home and do my work. See, travelling time to school is an hour, class is 1 and a half hours and back is another hour. Quite a waste of time.

And there is seriously something wrong with me. I can’t seem to get enough rest no matter how much I sleep. It’s scary how much I sleep and fast I will go deeeeeep into sleep once I put my head on the pillow. Hon (my lecturer) told us this sleep cycle thingy..I have been wanting to try it but it takes time to experiment and stuff. I found out something really interesting though which I am really lazy to type.

Audrey got a job at Borders! Damn..I was thinking of quitting Starbucks to go there but from what she told me, it seem like I have to apply like within this week cos training starts next Monday. And training is the whole of next week 8am - 5pm. It’s impossible..I got class and assignments due. I am quite sad cos Borders seem like a really fun place to work. We will see how it goes, I will during my hols in two weeks time. I was so frustrated and upset about it but something tells me to calm down. I think it’s God. Yeah..all the religious stuff. As most of you know..I haven’t been going church lately and I have been screwing my life up but God will be a apart of me..forever. That’s the only thing I can be sure. Let’s just say, currently I doing some soul searching and I hope it doesn’t take forever or I will be going to hell.
Ok, I hope I didn’t sound wierd.

Anyway, I didn’t go much work today..I was just tired and felt like a worm and I am so sick of doing my line art and vector stuff. BLAAAAAAAH. I watched Mr & Mrs Smith instead. The movie is alright..story is alittle blah..but Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie is really hot and sexy.

Oh anyway, this is the collage I am talking about. My Threadless shirt came in yesterday! All the way from Chicago baby!

Yeah..that’s the only thing that cheered me up for a while.

I wanna eat and chew myself.

Today was Prepress’ assignment submission. I guess I could have make it just in time at 3pm if I really want to get everything done but I hate rushing so I decided to take MC and hand in later. I finally completed it it just now..figured out the whole laterally inverted to print double-sided.

I bought a book called Between Two Rivers by Nicholas Rinaldi. It’s about New Yorkers’ life through the eye’s of a concierge. I like books like these..about life and it’s ups, downs, shits and heavens.

The stupid shits incidents that happened during work kept running through my mind. I don’t know..it affected me alot cos it made me feel like worst than a piece of shit. Maybe I am being too sensitive..I was/am having PMS.

I told my sis I was thinking of quitting. I got no idea why..just suddenly burst out in tears. That moment felt wierd..like things I refuse to admit because I want to seem/be strong..things that didn’t seem to be much a problem seem to cause my world to collapsed. Maybe it’s the PMS. I haven’t talked to anyone much about anything in a long time. A very long time. I am fucking lonely but it seem being alone is a sort of security for me.

I have changed over the year and it’s major changing. I fucking hate the change but I don’t know..things happened and you drive yourself crazy. I have became very unloveable. People drifted from me. People scold me.

My dad don’t like me much anymore..he said it.

Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin was killed today (read here). I am really shocked and sad. I mean..well sometimes it’s quite funny to see the way he talks and behave and stuff but it’s a pity he died cos he’s like an icon. Everyone knows him. He is so passionate about animals..and then killed by them. When switch to Animal Planet on cable, majority of the time, it’s his show..now we will never see it much anymore. It’s really sad.

Yes I am serious.

It was a terrible terrible fucked up day today. First I woke up late for work, secondly, my manager pissed the fuck off me. I don’t know what the fuck was wrong with him. He is always the nice guy at work and I really treated him like a friend but today he was just fucking bias and rude to me. If I did something really wrong and offended him..fair enough but I did not. I will not go into details and waste my time. It was because of something really fucked up reason that has no fucking business to do with me. When I knock off work, I said bye to him specifically and he just totally ignored me. That was really it..I completed changed my impression of him.

Nick was very nice to come down to hear me rant.

I think everyone knows I love my job but I don’t know..not as much as I thought I would. Maybe it’s the workload and stress level there..maybe it’s too tiring for me, maybe it’s the people, the customers, maybe cos the traveling is too much. I just had this suddenly crazy idea to quit. I don’t know. I know my health had definately declined, I can’t manage school work and I have no social life. I hate all these shit.

After work, went Borders, got a book and some stuff. Boo, didn’t get a discount from Nick cooos his supervisor was no where to be found.

My Prepress work got fucked up and I have to redo everything.

Today was the most fucked up day.